By: R.C. Boldt
Releasing January 10, 2017
Definition: the female equivalent of a cock block.
Example: You’re chatting with a guy you’re interested in and your friend comes along and lays claim to him.
That’s my life—except it’s worse. My friend who keeps “jamming” me is my gay roommate and if that isn’t a W.T.F. moment, I’m not sure what is.
Fact: He went home with three—yes, three—of the guys I had been so sure were into me.
Fact: He’s really pissing me off. I mean, hello? I’m trying to get back in the saddle, but I’ll never manage to get a boyfriend before the age of fifty if he keeps this up.
Fact: Secretly, I wonder what it would be like if he weren’t gay. Why do all the hot, sweet, tender-hearted guys have to be gay?
Fact: My gay-dar needs a serious tune-up.
The day I interviewed for the room to rent, everything changed. I knew I had met “the girl”, except there was one small problem: she didn’t want anything to do with men. I recognized a top-notch force field when I saw one. She’d been burned badly and didn’t want to deal with a heterosexual guy as a roommate. I could’ve turned around and found another place to live, but I wanted to live there—with her.
So I had to go “undercover”.
Fact: I’m in love with my roommate.
Fact: I’m a likely candidate for carpal tunnel surgery since all the action I’ve had for the past year has been my hand.
Fact: She’s going to hate me if I come clean now.
Fact: I’m not giving up. Which means, I’ll just have to continue to run defense until I figure out a way to get Maggie to see the “real” me.
The me that loves her.
The me that would never do her wrong.
Until then, I’ll keep running off every guy who shows any interest.
Until then, I’ll continue to Clam Jam.
“But she doesn’t want anything to do with men, Ry. What are you going to do? Just casually bring it up one morning that you’re actually hetero?” He scoffs, shaking his head at me. “I see that going over real well.”
“I haven’t gotten that far but, this way, I can get to know her without all that shit getting in the way. The whole nervousness, the whole showing the other person your best at all times until you’re really committed and then it all comes out.”
“And you’re going to do this by being dishonest from the get-go.”
Running my hands down my face, I let out a frustrated groan. “What was my other option? To let her go, to never have an opportunity to get to know her—to never get to be her friend, at the very least—without her feeling like I have any ulterior motives—”
“Which you do.”
“—and be faced with the possibility of me being too late and another guy getting to her when she decides she’s ready to start dating again?”
“I’d like to go on record and say that you’ve been watching too many damn chick flicks.”
He’s silent for a moment, staring at me before his lips twitch, slowly forming a smirk. “So how long have we been together, love muffin?”
The breath I’ve been holding in comes out in a slow exhale. “For a while.” Holding up a finger, I add, “But we have an ‘open’ relationship.”
His eyebrows arch at that. “Why, you little player, you. Won’t commit to being monogamous, huh?” He tips his beer to his lips, takes a swig, and grins. “I bet I can convince you to be mine within a few months tops, pookie bear.”
I make a face, scoffing, “Not likely.”
He waves a hand dismissively. “You’ll be putting out before long. Mark my words.”
“You’re not right.” I laugh, shaking my head at him.
“You’re the one who’s pretending to be gay.”
We both take a swig of beer and fall silent for a moment before Jack finally speaks.
“Can’t say that I’ve ever pretended to be someone’s gay lover before.” His face stretches into a wide, toothy grin.
And, just like that, my best friend is officially involved in my game plan. All for the sake of a woman I’m convinced is “the one.”
Describe yourself in five words or less.
Sarcastic, organized, wino, loud, happy
What did you enjoy most about writing this book?
Maggie, with her internal dialogue, was the most fun to write. She was definitely quirky in her own right but, I like to think she’s also quite realistic in voicing what I feel a lot of women think.
Name three things on your desk right now.
My planner, my Sharpie ultra fine point pen, and my laptop.
If you could trade places with anyone for just one day, who would you be?
My daughter, because I never went to Pre-K and I’m pretty much convinced I missed out on something HUGE. Snack time, going to the park, Art, etc. No homework, no bills, singing out of tune without any judgment… Sign me up for that.
What are some books that you enjoyed recently?
Managed by Kristen Callihan, Someone Like You by Lauren Layne, and Vicious by L.J. Shen.
Is there anything that you would like to say to your readers and fans?
I am so incredibly grateful for your support! I could never truly manage to put into words how thankful I am.
Can you tell us about your upcoming book?
Out of the Ashes is scheduled for release in May. It’s a standalone about a Navy SEAL who was left in the hands of hell’s cruelest gatekeepers and the one woman ready to show him that his life isn’t over, that he’s worthy of love. She might be the only one to prove to him that sometimes even a phoenix needs help rising out of the ashes.
RC Boldt is the wife of Mr. Boldt, a retired Navy Chief, mother of Little Miss Boldt, and former teacher of many students. She currently lives on the southeastern coast of North Carolina, enjoys long walks on the beach, running, reading, people watching, and singing karaoke. If you're in the mood for some killer homemade mojitos, can't recall the lyrics to a particular 80's song, or just need to hang around a nonconformist who will do almost anything for a laugh, she's your girl.
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